A CURRENT TV AD I HATE

It's a slow news day and I am feeling a bit curmudgeonly, so indulge me a bit while I rant about something that has absolutely no ill effect on my general wellbeing. It's the (relatively) new TV ad for Sandals. You know it as the reasonably-priced resort that even most of us still-employed middle-class worker bees can't afford any more. The copy itself isn't that bad. Okay, it is pretty schmaltzy, and obviously meant to trigger our "even in these tough economic times," emotional switch, but it's still not the worst part. It goes something like this:
"What could be more important than the ones we love? The ones who love us? So, if you're asking yourself if it's time to get away..." yadda yadda yadda...
Nope, the script isn't the offensive part. What has the bile half-rising in my throat is the voice talent they hired. The images are of a flawless, way-under-40 couple, nuzzling romantically as the ocean breeze blows their perfect hair and gauzy beach wraps in slo-mo.
Cue the voiceover: It's a smug-sounding twenty-something with a crackling, smartass voice that conjures up mental images of Eddie Haskell trying to sound earnest, and fighting the urge to dissolve in laughter at the copy he's recording. Listen closely. At any moment, you'll expect him to cover the mike and tell his producer, "You kiddin' me? Nobody goes to this place to rekindle a spark. They go there to rub suntan lotion on strangers and lay, blissfully blitzed, on the beach for a week." It's the voice of the fraternity pledgemaster who stole your never-mailed, drunkenly composed love letter to the girl who just dumped you, then read it aloud to the entire brotherhood during hell week. Maybe you still wake up in a cold sweat occasionally, having dreamt this guy (or his son) is your new boss. James Spader launched his career playing this character back in the '80s. You get the idea.
What I want to know is, which ad agency is responsible for this, and did they do any market research at all before settling on this particular voice talent? Granted, nobody wants Wilford Brimley doing a voiceover that's supposed to be both family-friendly and sexy, but neither do we want to envision our neighbor's teenager spying over the backyard fence as we cuddle in the hammock with our spouse.
Sandals, if you really want this ad to work, tell your agency to hire a grownup to re-do the voice bit. One that makes women think of a straight Marlboro Man, all weather-beaten and macho, holding a glass of good Scotch. And while you're at it, get a real couple, with just a few battle scars, too, for the visual. One that you can picture having a passle of rebellious kids at home, and having to choose between a week at Sandals, or replacing the roof.
Bet your sales go waaaay up.